


To Be By Your Side I Would Willing Storm the Gates of the Black City.

by Sweets_Thief



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-07
Updated: 2016-08-07
Packaged: 2018-08-07 06:05:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7703413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sweets_Thief/pseuds/Sweets_Thief
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>a collection for zevwarden week on tumblr /o/</p><p>1: Zevwarden meeting<br/>2: Zevwarden pirate AU<br/>3: Zevrwarden first time eue<br/>4: Zevwarden and the Crows<br/>5: Zevwarden earring<br/>6: Zevwarden sparring<br/>7: Zevwarden after the Blight</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Meeting

**Author's Note:**

> these are the fics i wrote for zevwarden week on tumblr /o/  
> you can check them out on my tumblr: http://rannystuffandthings.tumblr.com/
> 
> individual chapter summaries included /o/  
> My Warden is male!Cousland with the set name Aedan. He's lawful good and helps pretty much everyone, and does the final sacrifice at the end.
> 
> Day 1: Zevran has been sent to kill the Grey Wardens. Aedan has other ideas.

 

 

“What do we do with him?” Alistair asked, nudging the prostate elf with his foot as Aedan approached, wiping blood from his face.

The elf stirred at the movement and his eyes opened. Alistair didn’t miss the look of relief in Aedan’s eyes that he hadn’t died. “Mmm…what happened? I…oh.”

As the elf pushed himself up onto his elbows, Aedan knelt down with a safe distance between them. There was a moment of silence as their eyes met and the elf’s breath caught in his throat. The smile that he was greeted with was soft, beautiful, not the smile someone who was facing their would-be-assassin would normally wear. “I did think I’d wake up dead, or not wake up at all in that respect. But it seems you have yet to kill me.” He finally managed to say.

“Why I’m not entirely sure.” Alistair said drily, his arms folded. Aedan frowned at Alistair, who shrugged but didn’t say anything else.

Turning his attention back to the elf, Aedan spoke quietly, “I have some questions for you.”

“So I am to be interrogated first, yes?” The elf chuckled, wincing as he shifted. “How about I save you the struggle? My name is Zevran, of the Antivan Crows, hired to assassinate any surviving Grey Wardens wandering Ferelden. Sadly, I have failed, no.”

“I’m happy you did. Are you okay?” Aedan smiled, shifting his position so he was kneeling a little more comfortably. Zevran shifted as well, supporting himself as best he could despite his wounds, wondering whether he should answer Aedan’s question or whether it was rhetorical. “Who hired you?”

“A man by the name of Loghain I believe, in the capital, though someone else hired me for him.” Zevran replied honestly, raising an eyebrow at the rather sharp intake of breath from Alistair and the grimace that passed quickly over Aedan’s face. “Ahh so you know him?”

“Of course.” Aedan confirmed, “Are you loyal to him?”

“No I’m not really. Let’s just say when the Crows give you an order you follow it.” Zevran replied airily, avoiding Aedan’s eyes as he spoke. Aedan hummed as he considered what he next question would be. Alistair, Morrigan and Leliana stood behind him, waiting for him to speak, although it was clear Alistair had something he wanted to say.

“And now you’ve failed?”

“A good question,” Zevran laughed, “That is between the Crows and Loghain. And the Crows and myself.”

“And between me and you?” Aedan pressed, leaning forward a little as he spoke.

Alistair swapped a look with Morrigan, who was smiling as though she knew something no one else did.

Zevran looked up at Aedan through slightly hooded eyes, “Isn’t that what we’re establishing now?” Aedan’s eyes widened a little bit and Zevran definitely saw the sheen of excitement in their depths. Confused, he stayed quiet, waiting for the Warden to either continue his questioning or kill him.

“When were you to see Loghain next?” Aedan asked.

“When I had killed you. Now that I have failed, never.”

“Aren’t you at least loyal? Surely you should tell him you failed?” Aedan inquired, a rather innocent tilt to his head.

Zevran chuckled again. “I can’t quite tell if you are serious. May I ask, have you heard of the Antivan Crows?”

Aedan nodded, “I’ve heard stories.”

“Clearly you’ve not been hearing the right ones.” Zevran smiled, “If I went back to Loghain now the Crows would kill me. And I rather like being alive. I have a proposition for you, if you’d care to hear it?”

Aedan glanced at Alistair, Morrigan and Leliana.

“I suggest we hear him out. Killing him without good reason would not be advisable.” Leliana spoke first, although her stance was guarded, ready to attack if Zevran moved the wrong way.

“It can’t hurt to hear him out I suppose.” Morrigan shrugged.

“You aren’t really considering listening to him are you?” Alistair put in before Morrigan could say anything else. “He just admitted he had been hired to kill us! By Loghain!”

“He has had plenty of opportunities to kill me now while I’ve been knelt in front of him.” Aedan pointed out, “And I suspect he could have done, should he have wanted to.”

“You have an excellent eye, Warden.” Zevran said, confirming Aedan’s suspicions.

Aedan. Please call me Aedan.” He requested, a soft smile in place. Zevran found himself smiling as well despite the building pain and the uncertainty of his survival.“

“Of course. Now, for my proposal.” Zevran began, coughing to try and hide his embarrassment. “Clearly I have failed to kill you, no? And the Crows will kill me if they find me. Unfortunately for the Crows I rather like living, and from what I can see, you’re clearly capable of looking after yourself. Let me stay with you, and serve you instead.”

Aedan’s eyebrows raised, and he crossed his arms. “Can I expect the same loyalty as Loghain. What is to stop you finishing the job later?”

Zevran found himself laughing again, and though it hurt it also felt good. Aedan was laughing as well, though his laughter was more subdued. “I doubt I’d get a chance. As I said before you don’t have a choice when the Crows want you but to succeed or die. Chances are if I killed you, they’d kill me for failing the first time. Killing you would not be in anyone’s best interest.”

Aedan hummed again and climbed to his feet. Zevran remained where he was as Aedan dug through his pack and withdrew a few health poultices and bandages.

“Will the Crows come after you?” He asked as he continued to search, watched by a rather sceptical looking Alistair.

“If they do I can look after myself. And you. Not that you need it, you’re clearly big and strong.”

Aedan went a little red and he bit his lips as he tried to stop himself from reacting, but Zevran noticed the little shake in his shoulders with interest. There was clearly something between them, if the fact that Aedan couldn’t stop smiling and the sparkling interest in his eyes were anything to go by.

“I’ll help your wounds.” Aedan said, his voice carefully light. Morrigan rolled her eyes. “And then you can come with us.”

“What?” Alistair demanded, “You’re taking the assassin with us? Really? Is that a good idea?”

“It will be fine Alistair. Trust me.” Aedan said gently, turning to Alistair with a soft smile just for him.

Alistair went a little red and nodded, “I suppose. But it’s just…if there was ever a sign we were desperate it just knocked.”

“Well if we’re all having a say, I’d check your food a little more closely now.” Morrigan said, putting her hood up as it had started to drizzle.

“Excellent advice for anyone.” Zevran chipped in. Aedan nodded.

Leliana sheathed her weapons properly and offered Zevran a smile of her own. “Welcome Zevran. Having an Antivan Crow on our side would be nice.”

“No one told me there were such beauties amongst adventurers.” Zevran quipped, “Had I known I would have joined a long time ago.”

“Or not.” Leliana frowned.

Aedan smiled widely and held out his hand, helping Zevran to his feet. The elf wavered slightly because of his wounds and Aedan steadied him, his hands gently on his waist. Zevran looked up at him and his expression grew serious.

“I hereby swear my oath of loyalty to you, until such a time as you choose to release me from it. I am your man without reservation. This I swear.”


	2. Pirates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zevran is a wandering pirate, until he decides he wants to infiltrate the Highever Revenge, captained by the famous raider, Aedan Cousland.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 2 was AU day, so I decided to go for a pirate AU /o/   
> Zevran says a line about pirates when you're going through his romance and it's so funny :L

 

 

The legend of the Seawolf was famous across land and sea. The legend of her son was greater. Aedan Cousland was, for all intents and purposes, a noble when on land. He lived with his brother, Lord Fergus Cousland and helped local communities with large donations. Aedan Cousland on the sea was a different story. From a young age he had been trained as a raider, and he had been raised on the sea by his mother. Stories of his abilities quickly spread, and he became infamous not for his cruelty, or for his success in taking over other ships, but for his kindness. And his persuasion. He would help anyone, sometimes for free, and how he actually made enough money to continue sailing was unknown. There were only a few people who knew the full story.

Zevran was one of those people.

He was a drifter, he didn’t belong to any one ship, but switched between them when greater prospects appeared. He had a little legend growing around him as well, the pirate for hire who would join any crew – and kill any enemy – for the right price. It went to his head and he decided to infiltrate the crew of the Highever Revenge, the ship captained by Aedan Cousland.

The first person the elf ran into when he slipped out of his hiding place the third night after the ship had left port was a small crew member, sitting by the helm. The stories of the Highever Revenge always put the Captain at the helm, and Zevran found himself standing with his arms crossed and one eyebrow raised.

“Are you not a little small for the legendary son of the Seawolf?” He asked, tilting his hat back to really get a look at the boy at the helm. It probably wasn’t a good idea to reveal himself so soon but Zevran just couldn’t believe that this was the fabled Charmer of the Seas.

“Oh I’m not.” The boy said, “He is.”

He had gestured behind Zevran and the elf turned and found himself facing a man, over six-foot-tall, with wideset shoulders and his head tilted to the side in confusion at the elf standing on the deck.

Zevran realised he had just been staring, thinking about the height and breadth of the man standing in front of him, and also the youth of his face. He was wearing a beautifully made trench coat, deep blue in colour with gold buttons, clearly of noble make.

Zevran finally found his tongue again. “Well you’re more like it. I can see why people would call you a Charmer.”

“My name is Aedan,” The man said quietly, “Can I help you?”

“Zevran Arainai, at your service.” Zevran replied with a small bow. Aedan returned the bow, though he still looked confused. “And you can help me. I’m here to take your ship.”

“Hmm.”

The noise was not particularly inspiring to Zevran, and Aedan didn’t look shocked at all. Zevran was clearly armed, as was Aedan, but the Captain just didn’t seem bothered, or threatened at all.

“What’s going on out here?” Another voice asked grumpily and another man came out.

“Oh Alistair, this is Zevran. He’s come to take the ship.” Aedan replied softly, “Are you armed?”

“No. Why, does he have a ship to fight us?” Alistair yawned.

“Do you?” Aedan inquired, turning back to Zevran.

“No. I think I can take your ship by myself.” Zevran answered, somewhat smugly.

“Are you sure you’d rather not just stay on the ship with me as well?” Aedan queried, a gentle smile on his face. “I’ve heard of you, Zevran. A drifter they call you, almost like a Crow. You never stay in one place but go wherever the prospects are the best. Why not spend some time aboard my ship before you decide to try and take it?”

“I…came aboard your ship threatening to kill you and you’re inviting me to stay?” Zevran asked slowly.

“You’ll get used to it.” Alistair put in, “This is just how Aedan is.”

Zevran considered the offer. Aedan was well known for his persuasive skills and his charming words, and it was tempting. He didn’t want to take a ship that turned out to be nothing like the stories, or to bring down a Captain easily and not actually win the fame that comes with bringing down a legend. Aedan waited patiently for Zevran’s response, as Alistair grumbled something about going back to bed since the elf didn’t really seem dangerous.

“Very well,” Zevran decided, “I’ll stay for now. But you won’t be safe while I’m around.”

Aedan’s face lit up with a brilliant smile. “That’s fine, no man is ever safe on the sea. Welcome aboard the Highever Revenge, Zevran Arainai.”

//

The sea had it in for him, Zevran decided, as he tried and failed again to braid his hair and tie it at the back of his head. Gentle hands soon replaced his, and Zevran found his hair braided and tied quickly. Smiling, he didn’t even have to look to know who had done that. Aedan was stood behind him, that normal, gentle smile on his lips as always, and his eyes sparkling despite the darkness around them. It was night time and the ship was empty. Aedan had ordered them to anchor for the night because he had predicted storms would be coming and he didn’t want to sail in the darkness into a storm. The clouds were growing darker and darker and every so often there was light drizzle, but no storm as of yet.

“What are you doing out here?” Aedan asked, leaning on the side of the ship and closing his eyes as the sea breeze splashed water on his face.

“I couldn’t sleep.” Zevran answered honestly, “I don’t know why I decided to become a pirate, the sea doesn’t agree with me.”

Chuckling, Aedan turned to look at Zevran and Zevran was sure he saw something shift in Aedan’s eyes.

“Alistair was the same when we first started together,” He admitted, “Every night we would spar before he went to bed so he would be exhausted and the sea wouldn’t bother him. Perhaps it would be the same for you?”

“There are other activities that I can think would tire me out.” Zevran murmured, winking as he spoke. Aedan flushed but didn’t look put off. “Would you dance with me, Captain?”

“Aedan, please.” Aedan requested, “No one has to call me Captain aboard the ship.”

Shaking his head in amusement Zevran took Aedan’s right hand and bowed. “Dance with me, Aedan.”

“Of course.” Aedan agreed.

They moved to the centre of the deck and took up a dancing stance. Aedan’s left hand was resting gently on Zevran’s waist, the fingers of the other entwined with Zevran’s. Zevran put his other hand on Aedan’s bicep.

“I didn’t know you danced.” Aedan spoke quietly, beginning the dance without any sort of music accompanying them. Zevran followed Aedan’s lead, as that was the natural stance they had taken up. “If I had I would have asked you earlier.”

“You had considered dancing with me?” Zevran asked, surprised. He looked up at Aedan and found the brown haired man looking down at him with such a look of gentleness and admiration in his face that it sent a thrill down Zevran’s spine. “Well if I had known you were interested I would have made a move earlier.”

“You told me I would not be safe around you.” Aedan reminded the elf, twirling him and pulling him closer with a small amount of pressure on his waist, “Have you re-evaluated?”

“You’re not what I expected, I’ll admit.” Zevran said, his voice a little breathy at the proximity between them. “The tales paint a picture darker than the reality. You inherited your mother’s title, no? A formidable woman before she retired. The stories say that you are just as formidable, and it’s true with words you are. But since I’ve been here you’ve gone after three ships, and each time you’ve left the entire crew alive and barely took anything for yourself. You even helped one of the men you were hired against. It’s strange.”

“My mother would always tell me that just because we were raiders, or pirates, it didn’t mean we had to be bad people. Good people could do good things on the sea, and there are plenty of bad people out there, we don’t want to be more.” Aedan explained softly, dipping Zevran and bringing their faced quite close together when he pulled him back up.

“I really do know why they call you the Charmer of the Seas.” Zevran whispered, his heart pounding in his chest. “You do have a way with words.”

“Not intentionally.” Aedan said, stopping the dance but still holding Zevran close, “I have a request for you.”

“Anything.”

“Do you still want to take my ship? Or would you be willing to remain, by my side? I won’t keep you here if you see prospects that are better for you, it’s in your nature after all. But for now, will you remain?” Aedan was nervous as he asked, and yet his voice sounded so hopeful and his eyes were full of anticipation for the answer.

Zevran considered his answer carefully. He had been aboard a lot of ships and after a few weeks he had grown board and made his escape to a different ship, with a different lot of people and a different mission. Being aboard the Highever Revenge with Aedan beside him, sailing around the sea and bringing joy to people, helping people, avoiding the senseless killing that came with the stereotype of being a pirate, it was the first place he had ever really felt home. He even felt comfortable around Alistair now, although he wasn’t sure Alistair really cared too much for him. But that didn’t matter. Aedan was asking him to stay, asking him to remain by his side. This man, who was feared and loathed across both land and sea was probably one of the nicest people to ever take up the name of a pirate. And Zevran wanted to remain by his side.

Pulling back from Aedan’s embrace, Zevran grinned and saluted. “Pirate Zevran reporting for duty! Prepare to be boarded.”


	3. First Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zevran attempts to seduce Aedan into his bed with a massage.

 

 

“A massage?” Aedan asked, looking up at Zevran as he knelt down to take off his armour.

“Yes a massage. You always look so tense my dear warden, I believe you could use some relaxation.” Zevran purred, offering Aedan a rather sultry smile.

Aedan looked away quickly in embarrassment, although Zevran wasn’t entirely sure the Warden really understood what he was referring to. A massage was a massage to most, but Zevran had other plans.

“You’ve done so much for me already,” The elf continued, “I want to give something back. I’m good with my hands, you know.”

“So I’ve heard.” Aedan murmured.

“Trust me my dear I won’t be using my hands for anything devious.” Zevran laughed. Aedan stood and stretched. Free of his armour Zevran was able to give his body a fully appreciative once over. For a rogue Aedan was strongly built, and gave the impression of a warrior and Zevran wanted to caress and kiss every inch of his skin. “Trust me.”

“I do.” Aedan said, “Okay. A massage. But please don’t call me Warden, you should use my name Zevran.”

Zevran grinned and took Aedan’s hand. “I’ll take my time and go as slow as you like, Aedan.”

Flushing, Aedan pulled his hand free gently. “I need to talk to Alistair about the night watch. Then I’ll come to your tent.”

“I look forward to it.” Zevran replied, catching Aedan’s hand again and drawing it to his lips. Aedan froze, tensed, before nodding and mumbling something about Alistair again. Zevran let him go, amused by his reactions.

–

Alistair was giving Zevran a suspicious look when Aedan came over. “What’s he asking you about?”

“He wants to give me a massage.” Aedan admitted, “We should talk about the night watch.”

“I can handle it.” Alistair said, “Leliana and I can handle it.” He added when Aedan raised his eyebrows. “Look Aedan, be careful okay?”

“What do you mean?” Aedan asked.

“I don’t trust Zevran,” Alistair explained quietly, “I know he’s been with us for a while and he’s not made a move yet, but he could at any time. And I don’t think he really wants to just give you a massage.”

“Well, what else could he want to give me?” Aedan inquired, folding his arms, “I trust him Alistair. A massage is just a massage okay? Maybe I should give you one as well, to take the tenseness from your shoulders.”

Alistair went red and shook his head. “No thank you. My shoulders have always looked like this, it’s what gives me my striking character.”

“Are you sure you can handle the watch?” Aedan pressed, glancing at Zevran’s tent.

“Yes, yes go and enjoy your late night…. massage.” Alistair shooed Aedan away with a short laugh, pushing at his shoulders. Aedan swatted at Alistair’s hands playfully and hurried back across the camp towards Zevran’s tent.

The elf was inside, knelt down, with a small bowl of oil by his knees and no shirt on. Aedan closed the flaps and fastened them, leaving them both bathed in the small light from the lantern in the corner of the room. Zevran smiled and gestured for Aedan to sit down.

“You should take off your shirt.” He suggested, “It will make it easier for me to get to your muscles.”

Aedan nodded and slipped off his shirt and undershirt. Zevran reached out and gently stroked down from Aedan’s chest to his navel and the warden shivered under his touch. Dipping one finger in the oil, Zevran brought it back to Aedan’s chest and drew a symbol around his navel.

“What was that?” Aedan asked.

“Nothing of note.” Zevran replied, “I’m just getting you used to the temperature of the oil.”

“It’s nice.” Aedan hummed, “How…how do you want me?”

“On your front, my dear.” Zevran requested, “With your arms by your sides and your head to one side, either side.”

Nodding Aedan slid onto his stomach, his arms lay flat at his sides and his head turned to the right, looking into the flickering light. Zevran examined him for a moment. He really was beautiful. And he had come here willingly and Zevran was excited to begin. A small massage to loosen him up, a few choice words, and the Warden would most likely be his. For the night anyway. Smiling at the thought Zevran shifted and straddled Aedan’s hips. Aedan made a noise and lifted himself up to look around at the elf. Zevran pushed him back down.

“Relax Aedan,” He murmured soothingly, “It’s the easiest way for me to reach your shoulders and your entire back.”

“Okay. Sorry.”

As Aedan lay back down again, his nervousness betrayed by the tenseness of his hips beneath Zevran’s thighs, Zevran dipped his hands into the oil and rubbed them together to warm the oil up even more. Bringing his hands down Zevran tested just how tense Aedan’s shoulders were and his mouth nearly dropped open.

“You have so much tension in your shoulders!” He exclaimed, continuing to feel down Aedan’s back to the small of it. “And knots. This is insane, why are you carrying so much stress?”

“Trying to stop a Blight is stressful.” Aedan mumbled, “And other things have happened as well.”

“When I’m done with you there will be no tense muscle in your body.” Zevran decided, “I don’t think I’ve ever known someone so in need of a massage.”

“I’m sorry. Is it a problem?” Aedan asked. Zevran shook his head and Aedan smiled. “I’m glad. Your hands are so soft.”

Zevran flushed and withdrew his hands on impulse. No one had ever called his hands soft before, even amongst all the lovers he had had. The hands of an assassin were not soft if they were a good assassin, they were mottled and callused from work. Aedan seemed to guess what Zevran was thinking as he shook his head as best he could.

“I don’t mean that your hands are physically soft, but your movements are. You’re gentle and soft. Even in battle. Your movements are fluid, and you’re always so careful. Like every death is special.” He explained, “There are calluses on your hands but they feel nice as well.”

“Hush now.” Zevran managed to say when the shock of Aedan’s words had sunk in. “Let me work.”

“Sorry.”

As Zevran began to work his shoulders from the outside to the spine Aedan relaxed completely under his hands. His eyes slipped closed and every so often a small noise of appreciation escaped his lips. All thoughts of seducing Aedan had gone from Zevran’s mind, he was solely focused on releasing the tension from his shoulders and back. It couldn’t have been comfortable, but looking at Aedan there was no evidence he was stressed at all. He was usually wearing a gentle smile, and his eyes were always warm. He barely ever looked tired and he would approach every problem they faced with the extreme energy.

Kneading Aedan’s shoulders, Zevran grinned when Aedan moaned and shifted under him. When he winced in pain Zevran would stay his hands and move on to somewhere else until Aedan was completely relaxed and then would move back to the more painful area. Aedan was breathing deeply by the time Zevran had finally finished, almost an hour and a half later.

“Are you asleep, my dear Warden?” Zevran asked quietly, sliding off Aedan’s hips and wiping his hands on a small rag.

Aedan shifted and muttered something, his eyes fluttering open and the smile that graced his lips when he focused on Zevran was beautiful.

“Are you finished? I’m sorry it was so relaxing I couldn’t help but drift off. Thank you Zevran, I feel so much better.” He said as he pushed himself up to his knees and rolled his shoulders.

“Perhaps you would like to…stay the night?” Zevran asked tentatively, “You have already made yourself comfortable after all.”

Aedan yawned and nodded, “I suppose I have. Are you sure you wouldn’t mind?”

“Of course not. I imagine we’ll be spending quite a few nights together in the future.” Zevran smiled, gesturing for Aedan to turn around so he could wipe the oil from his back. Aedan was so relaxed now his movements had lost their usual gracefulness and when Zevran was done the Warden tried to turn around and ended up somehow tripping over himself – despite being knelt down – and knocked Zevran over.  
“Well, well, are we not moving a bit fast, Aedan?” Zevran purred.

Aedan was flushed red, hovering over Zevran with their faces inches apart. “I’m sorry. I can be awfully clumsy sometimes.”

“Come closer I don’t mind.” Zevran tilted his head a little bit and their lips brushed ever so slightly. Aedan pulled back, surprised, but didn’t pull completely away. After another minute of leaning over Zevran, Aedan finally climbed off him and reached for his shirt.

“We have to leave early tomorrow so we should sleep.” He murmured, “Are you sure you’d like me to stay?”

Zevran nodded, “I would. If you will.”

“Of course.”

“I wonder what the other’s will think.” Zevran chuckled, “Our dear Warden in the tent with the Antivan rogue.”

“Their opinions are their own.” Aedan replied quietly, yawning again, “You gave me a massage and then we slept. What’s wrong with that.”

“Absolutely nothing.” Zevran said fondly, “Goodnight my dear Warden.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wanted to write NSFW for this day but my headcanon was that their supposed first time was actually a massage bc aedan was so tense :L


	4. The Crows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Crows come after Zevran and Aedan gets caught up in it. After they discuss what to do about the impending threat.

 

 

“I’m going for some more firewood.” Aedan said, addressing the group more than any one person in particular.

“Don’t go alone.” Alistair replied immediately, standing up from where he had been stirring a pot of stew, “We shouldn’t really go anywhere alone.”

“I’m not going far.” Aedan countered, “Maybe twenty paces from the camp. I’ll be fine Alistair.”

“You’d say the same thing.” Alistair pointed out, “If someone else was going out alone.”

“I doubt it.” Morrigan chipped in, having wandered over from her own fire to try and find some fire wood for it. “His mother-hen instincts aren’t as honed as yours.”

“I’m not a mother-hen!” Alistair exclaimed, turning to Morrigan. Aedan took this as an excuse to leave, smiling fondly as the banter struck up between Morrigan and Alistair as normal.

Zevran watched him leave with a neutral look, his arms folded. Leliana approached him.

“What’s bothering you?” She asked.

“Oh nothing really,” Zevran said airily. “I agree with what Alistair has said surprisingly and I’m concerned for myself.”

Leliana laughed but Alistair didn’t seem to hear, to busy arguing back and forth with Morrigan.

“I’m going after him.” Zevran continued, “Make sure he doesn’t get himself into trouble.”

Leliana nodded and watched the elf slip away. Alistair had glanced around to seek support from Aedan for what Morrigan had said and found both Aedan and Zevran missing.

“Well at least he hasn’t gone alone.” Leliana pointed out, walking back over to the dying fire.

“Yes he’s gone with the most comforting person in the group.” Morrigan said drily and Alistair sighed.

//

Zevran was quiet as he followed Aedan’s trail through the forest. It was difficult, Aedan was a rogue and he was good at hiding his tracks, but Zevran could tell which way he had gone. And it wasn’t just Aedan he was tracking. For a while Zevran had had a feeling someone was following them, and as they had been setting up camp that night the person had revealed themselves accidently. It was a Crow, definitely, and they were after Aedan. Taking a calming breath, Zevran withdrew his dual blades and stepped out into the clearing where Aedan was stood calmly gathering firewood. He clearly heard Zevran approach because he turned and smiled.

“Have you come to help? You don’t need your blades there’s some dead wood on this tree, it comes off easily enough.” Aedan stated, going back to his work. Zevran frowned. Had Aedan not felt the presence? Or did he not feel threatened by it? Glancing around trying to find the hiding place Zevran noticed a body lay by Aedan’s feet, dual blades wedged through its chest into the ground. Aedan was standing just outside a pool of blood gathering the wood and there was splatter up his arms.

“You…you killed them.” Zevran muttered, taken aback.

“The assassin?” Aedan questioned, “Yes. Why, should I have kept him alive?”

“Well no, it’s a good thing you killed him.” Zevran said hastily, “But I just…didn’t realise you knew he was here.”

“He revealed himself.” Aedan shrugged, “I asked him to stand down, asked him what he wanted but he didn’t say anything. And then he attacked. So I defended myself.”

“He was not just any assassin; he was a Crow.” Zevran explained, “He was here for me.”

“Hmm. Why didn’t he attack you then?” Aedan asked, turning with an armful of wood for both their fire and for Morrigan’s. “Not that I wanted you to be attacked.”

“This was a ploy. To get me alone he came after you. But he accidently revealed himself. And he got killed for it.” Zevran guessed, “We should go back to camp. Let me get your weapons.”

“Thank you.”

They walked in silence and were met with panic when they appeared and Alistair noticed Aedan was covered in blood.

“What happened?!” He demanded.

“An assassin.” Aedan said simply, bypassing Alistair and going straight to the fire. He laid down half the wood and then turned to Morrigan. “I got wood for you too Morrigan.”

“Thank you,” Morrigan smiled, and Aedan followed her over to her small camp area and laid down the wood he had gathered for her.

Zevran touched Aedan’s arm when the Warden finally came back over and drew him a little way away from Alistair, who had begun stoking the fire with Wynne’s help.

“I believe we should talk, no?” Zevran asked.

“About the Crows. I do have some questions.” Aedan nodded, “Come to my tent.”

When Zevran had settled down in the tent Aedan fastened the flaps and sat opposite him. This had been a long time coming, Zevran decided, ever since he had made it clear to Aedan that if he lived the Crows would come for him.

“What are you going to do about the Crows?” Aedan inquired, playing with the hem of his tunic as he spoke. “Now they’re clearly coming after you.”

“There isn’t really anything I can do I’m afraid.” Zevran sighed, “Just let them come and kill them when they do.”

“I will help you.” Aedan pledged, “I’ll help you fight them when they come.”

Zevran smiled, “Of course you will. I wouldn’t expect anything else.”

Aedan looked confused but didn’t question it, “Are you afraid?”

“With you at my side? You killed a Crow without any thought, and you beat me. I may be, ah what is the phrase, tooting my own horn, is it? Yes, I may be doing that but I was a very good assassin.” Zevran chuckled, “And you took me down rather easily. I underestimated you, Warden.”

“Aedan.” Aedan said firmly, “I’m not sure how we beat you. At that point I-…well things were that good.”

“The Crows have found a worthy adversary in you I believe.” Zevran commented, “But they are not coming after you anymore. Although if they find out about our involvement they may. Do you still wish to continue?”

The elf’s heart was pounding as he waited for Aedan’s reply. Why did he want Aedan to reply favourably? At the moment their relationship was purely physical, and there would never be anymore as far as Zevran was concerned. Aedan’s hand came up to cup Zevran’s cheek and he was looking at Zevran with such a gentle expression that Zevran felt his heart skip a beat.

“The Crows pale in comparison to the importance of being with you.” Aedan murmured, “Let them come, they’re not the only people after us are they?”

“Well you do have a point there my dear.”

“Whenever they come I will protect you.” Aedan confirmed.

“And whenever they come I shall protect you as well.” Zevran agreed, “But let’s hope they do not come too often, no? We must focus on the Blight after all.”

They kissed and silence fell between them for a while until Aedan found his voice.

“Do you regret failing, Zevran?” He asked quietly.

“No.” Zevran replied immediately. “When I failed to kill you, my life was forfeit. And yet you took my life and gave it right back to me. And whenever the Crows come you’ll continue to protect me even though I can protect myself. It’s almost as if being born anew. There was never a life for me outside the Crows and now…well now there is this.”

“I’m sorry that it had to happen during such a horrible time.” Aedan apologised, “I wish we could have met in happier times.”

“I’m just glad we met at all.” Zevran smiled, shifting closer and kissing him again. Aedan relaxed, slipping his arms around Zevran and pulling him closer. There could have been Crows watching the group now but neither of them cared. For now, all that mattered was each other. They’d deal with the Crows when, and if, they came.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aedan is a perfect puppy /o/ he will protect his elf


	5. Proposal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aedan asks Zevran to pierce his ears after Zevran gave him his earring.

 

 

The Arl of Redcliffe’s estate was extremely quiet, Zevran mused, as he leaned on a parapet of the roof. Everyone was resting, getting ready for tomorrow when they would have to lay siege to the Arl of Denerim’s estate to rescue the current Queen. Aedan had wanted to go at night, but Eamon had suggested going during the day, when the majority of soldiers would be deployed around the city, would be better. Zevran now couldn’t sleep.

Before they had reached the Arl’s Estate after entering the city they had been attacked by the Crows, specifically Taliesen. The Crow had spoken about how Zevran could have returned to the Crows, could go back to his old life without a problem and Aedan had spoken before Zevran could. He had exclaimed that Zevran didn’t need the Crows anymore, he was free to choose his own path now, and he was with them. And he wouldn’t let Aedan go without a fight. When the fight had been over on impulse Zevran had given Aedan an earring, a trinket that had meant a lot to him, and Aedan had asked if it was a token of affection. Zevran hadn’t known how to respond, and they had left it at that.

“What do I do now?” Zevran sighed, his head in his hands. His heart raced every time he thought of Aedan. All his training with the Crows had told him that love was weak, that feelings were weak, and here he was in love with someone. And he was pretty sure Aedan felt the same, had felt the same for a long time. He wanted something more. He wanted so much with Aedan but he was also afraid.

“I thought I saw you up here.” Aedan’s voice came out of nowhere but Zevran didn’t jump, he had sensed someone approaching. “What’s wrong. We have a long day ahead of us, you should get some rest.”

“Compared to what we normally do this is resting.” Zevran replied, “What are you doing awake?”

“I was going for a drink, and to take Fang for a walk.” Aedan said honestly, nodding down at the Mabari sitting patiently by his feet. When Zevran looked at him he barked and Aedan shushed him quickly. Fang looked proud and went to back again, so Aedan quickly pulled a biscuit from his pocket and shoved it at him. “I have a request, if you’re not too tired.”

“Oh?” Zevran grinned, taking a step closer with a wink. “What sort of request?”

“Well, would you pierce my ears?” Aedan asked. He held out his hand, showing Zevran he was carrying the earring the elf had given him a few hours previously. “My mother was going to pierce my ears at my next birthday but…well that can’t happen now. So I wish you to, if you will.”

“You…you want to wear my earring?” Zevran asked in disbelief.

“Did…did you not want me too?” Aedan inquired, unsure if he had upset Zevran or not.

“I just…well I mean I didn’t realise that it meant that much to you.” Zevran murmured, “Enough for you to pierce your ears to wear it.”

Aedan nodded vigorously. “It means so much. Especially since you made me aware that it meant so much to you. I wanted to say that I’m thankful that you stayed. And I want to wear this. No one except us is really going to understand the significance of it except for you and me, but I want to wear it. I want to be able to wear it and know that well…there’s something between us at least.”

Zevran went red and turned away. “I can pierce your ear for you.”

“Would you like to stay with me tonight, when we’re done. To help you-.”

“No!” Zevran interrupted. “Sorry, no. I don’t…I mean…no.”

“What’s wrong?” Aedan asked, stepped closer and turning Zevran to look at him gently, “Has something changed?”

“Nothing’s changed. I just…I just don’t think that’s what we should be thinking about right now.” Zevran snapped, “Do you want me to pierce your ears or not?”

“I was just suggesting that we share a bed.” Aedan said quietly, avoiding Zevran’s eyes. Fang whined, noticing a difference in the air between the two companions. “When I was having problems when we first started travelling Alistair would come and sleep near me, so I could feel a presence and it calmed me enough to sleep. I just thought it would be a good idea to try it with you.”

Aedan turned to leave after he had finished, whistling for Fang to follow him. Zevran reached out and grabbed his hand before he got too far. “Wait, Aedan.”

“Hmm?”

“I’m sorry. I just…in the Crows we are taught feelings and emotions have no place. One of my first jobs, I was convinced by a target that the Crows would spare her if I pleaded for her life. I learnt after that that she was using me to get to the Crows. And then, well, then I learnt from the Crows what happened to those that let their emotions get the better of them.” Zevran began, stumbling over his words a little bit as he rushed to explain his reaction. “And now I’m developing feelings for you. And I’m confused. What do I do with these emotions?”

“I can’t advise you,” Aedan admitted quietly, “I’ve never been in that situation and I don’t want to give you redundant advice. But I know what you can do from here, if you’d like.”

“What?” Zevran asked.

“We can focus on those emotions together. And we can explore them, together. It’s normal to feel love Zevran, and you’re not a Crow anymore. You can let those emotions in. I…I love you.” Aedan replied, “I’ve loved you for a while. When you gave me the earring I…my heart swelled with happiness. I really want to spend more time with you, especially when this ordeal is over.”

“Love.” Zevran repeated with a murmur, “I love you too. I do. It’s hard. How do we…how do we deal with this?”

“How about,” Aedan suggested, “We kiss, make up, and you pierce my ears. Then, we’ll sort out the Ferelden throne together, end the Blight together, and go from there?”

Zevran chuckled and nodded, “I like that idea.”

Aedan kissed Zevran’s cheek softly, then caught his lips in an even softer kiss. Zevran gripped Aedan’s shirt, allowing the kiss to stay soft and chaste rather than deepening it as he normally would. When they broke apart Aedan offered the earring again.

“We’d best go back inside to do this. I will need proper light.” Zevran murmured.

–

“This is going to hurt, are you going to be okay?” Zevran asked, his hand hovering near Aedan’s ear, holding a sharp needle.

Aedan nodded, “There’ve been a lot of things that have hurt on this journey Zevran, this will be the least of them all.”

Zevran accepted his words silently and positioned the needle. Aedan was holding a sliced piece of apple behind his ear for the needle to sink into and guide it, and without further ado Zevran stabbed the needle in. Aedan grit his teeth at the sharpness of the pain, but it passed quickly as Zevran withdrew the needle and brought a piece of cotton wool up to stem the short flow of blood. With quick hands Zevran fastened the earring in place, tucking Aedan’s hair behind his ear and kissing his cheek.

“There, all done. You look beautiful.” Zevran declared.

“My ear feels swollen,” Aedan said, tentatively reaching up to touch it. “Thank you.”

“Not at all. Now let’s get some rest. We have a Queen to save tomorrow.”

Aedan nodded and stood. They had gone to the room Aedan had been assigned to, and luckily it had a bed big enough for both of them. Stripping off his shirt Aedan climbed in first, and Zevran followed with a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach. When he settled on Aedan’s chest, entwined their fingers together and closed his eyes to drift off to sleep, he realised it was contentedness he was feeling. The rise of Aedan’s chest became steady and Zevran smiled, closing his eyes and falling asleep to the sound of Aedan’s heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Zevran's romance really gets going quite late on in the game if you do everything before the Landsmeet, and it's a shame because it's so good /o/


	6. Sparring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zevran decides to teach Aedan other techniques to being a rogue.

 

 

“I’ve been watching you during battle.” Zevran said as he approached Aedan, who was sitting a little way away from the fire tending to his blades. “Your techniques with the blades are exceptional, no doubt helped by your strength. But I see you’re lacking prowess in the more…well…rogue side of being a rogue.”

“What do you mean?” Aedan asked, putting one of his blades down and taking up the other.

“Stealth, poison, subterfuge, that sort of thing.” Zevran clarified, “You’re not really skilled in those areas. Stealth yes, but not for long, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen you use the dirtier fighting techniques.”

Aedan shifted, clearing a space so Zevran could sit next to him as they spoke. “My mother wanted to focus on my physical techniques before she focused on the dirtier side, as you put it.” He explained, “She never really got a chance to expand my knowledge or training with the ‘rogue side of being a rogue’. She wanted me to be able to fight and survive, and then the other things could come later.”

“A shame, you could be a truly magnificent rogue if you were fully trained.” Zevran sighed, mock disappointed.

Aedan smiled. “Why don’t you teach me?”

“What?”

Nodding Aedan continued, “Teach me what you know. You’re good at stealth, and I know you use poison and other dirty fighting tactics. So teach me, please.”

Considering the request for a moment Zevran nodded and stood up again. Aedan followed, leaving his duel blades on the floor. Raising an eyebrow Zevran went to ask why when Aedan disappeared in a cloud of smoke and reappeared, armed, behind Zevran, one sword to his neck.

“I’m sure there’s a lot we can learn together. It will be fun.” He quipped, a light but somewhat challenging smile on his face as he withdrew his swords from the elf and stood patiently.

Zevran grinned and unsheathed his own daggers. “I will make it fun.”

–

Leliana, Alistair and Shale were watching by the end of their sparring match. They were both panting, sweaty and tired, but neither had given in. Aedan had picked up some of the skills Zevran had decided to focus on, and Zevran had picked up on the unique twist Aedan put on the moves generally adopted by rogues thanks to his warrior like stature.

“You’re very quick and light on your feet,” Zevran praised, putting his daggers away to let Aedan know they were finished. “It’s a good surprise tactic for you in a way, most people will not think of you as a rogue and will be unprepared for your attack.”

“Like you?” Aedan asked, wiping his own daggers down of the light, harmless poison they had been covered in. “I know you didn’t think I was a rogue when we first met.”

“You’re right.” Zevran confirmed, laughing, “I did not. I was most surprised when I realised what you were. Even more so when I found out how skilled you were.”

The Warden smiled and held out a hand. Zevran shook it, keeping their hands joined afterwards and linking their fingers. Aedan blushed lightly but his eyes sparkled and he squeezed Zevran’s fingers as they re-joined the others. Alistair announced he had made food, which Aedan responded to enthusiastically, saying something along the lines of ‘Eating is a good way to produce energy after fighting!” With a grin Zevran joined them just as enthusiastically, although he made a stab at the food when Alistair served it, instigating banter between them and Morrigan.

–

“Good,” Zevran gasped, narrowly avoiding Aedan’s blade. Aedan withdrew the dagger quickly with an apology. “No that was good. Your stealth is getting better, something not easy for someone so big. Leliana has said she is going to help you as well, so you can look forward to that.”

Aedan nodded excitedly. “I feel like I’ve really been coming along! You’re a really amazing teacher, Zevran.”

Zevran went red, embarrassed, and turned away, “Yes well, it’s natural isn’t it?”

“I’m sure you said you wouldn’t be a good teacher when I asked you if you could teach other people to be assassins.” Aedan mused, “Has that gone out the window now?”

“You remember me saying that?” Zevran asked, surprised.

“Mm.” Aedan affirmed, “I remember everything you say to me. It’s important to understand your friends.”

“Oh. Well yes…I think we should stop there for today. You’ve nearly killed me enough for one night.” Zevran words came out rather disjointed, and before he could continue rambling Aedan took hold of his hand and kissed him gently.

“Really, thank you.” He murmured, “You’ve been amazing.”

“Anything for you.” Zevran said just as quietly in return. “Now maybe we can have a little different fun, hmm?”

“Of course.”

–

“Where’s Aedan?” Alistair asked, glancing around as they entered the designated camping area for the night. “We didn’t leave him behind did we?”

“I don’t think so.” Leliana replied, “Maybe he’s gathering something like firewood?”

As they stood looking into the gathering darkness for any sign of him, Aedan slipped by them, stealthed, and took up the tents. Zevran had told him that most of the time rogues were spotted when they did things during stealth, but the very best rogues could bypass people during stealth and remain quiet enough to do something to surprise them. Quickly Aedan laid out the tents ready to be set up, then casually kicked a stone lying next to him. Alistair jumped, reaching for his sword, as did Leliana and Zevran.

When the elf realised that it was just Aedan he laughed. “Very well played, my dear Warden. I never expected this.”

“Why am I not surprised you put him up to this?” Alistair exclaimed, “You nearly gave me a heart attack.”

“Sorry.” Aedan said sheepishly, “I wanted to surprise Zevran.”

“Consider me surprised.” Zevran declared, “I’m glad to see all the sparring we’re doing is paying off. The darkspawn won’t know what’s hit them.”

“Thank you.” Aedan said again, “Both you and Leliana. It really was fun.”

“I told you,” Zevran smirked, “I told you I’d made it fun.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i always headcanon my warden to be rly skilled at the more physical side of being a rogue and not the subterfuge side, but after Zevran and Leliana are done with him he's a fully rounded rogue /o/


	7. Sacrifice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aedan makes the ultimate sacrifice. Zevran tries to deal with the fallout.

 

 

Zevran had not spoken a word since the last battle against the Archdemon on the top of Fort Drakon. It had been two days, a breather for Denerim and its inhabitants and a time for everyone to find their relatives after the battle. Alistair had been busy, having to organise the rescue parties for those trapped during the destruction, and the parties of those people who would retrieve the bodies of those who had been killed and reunite them with their families. Morrigan was gone, Leliana was grieving, both Wynne and Sten seemed to have disappeared as well, Oghren was drunk and Shale had walked away. Only Fang remained, sitting at Zevran’s feet and following the elf around when he finally had the energy to move.

Alistair had given them all rooms in the palace and Zevran had barely left. His heart felt shattered and he was mentally tired. On the top of Fort Drakon they had faced the Archdemon and the Darkspawn it had summoned around it. Aedan and Alistair had swapped a look when the Archdemon had been weakened and then suddenly Aedan was gone. He had charged the creature, grabbing a warrior longsword as he ran and as the dragon brought its head down to stop him, Aedan went down, sliding along under the beast and slicing it’s belly open. When the Archdemon had fallen Aedan had plunged his sword into its head. The next few moments had passed by in a blur. Light had erupted from the Archdemon, and shockwaves were emitted from it, throwing Alistair, Wynne and Zevran to the ground. When Zevran had climbed back to his fee the Archdemon was dead, and Aedan lay next to it, motionless.

–

_“Aedan!” Zevran yelled, dropping his weapons and running over to his prone figure. There was no blood, nothing to indicate that Aedan had been wounded by the death of the Archdemon but as Zevran approached a heavy feeling closed over his heart. Aedan wasn’t moving. He was limp. Before he even reached his love, Zevran knew he was dead. “Aedan! What happened?! What happened?”_

_Alistair came over at a much slower pace, bloodstained with an expression of sorrow. He went down on his knees next to Aedan and took his hands. “We were told by Riordan how a Blight is ended.” He began quietly, “Why Grey Wardens were needed.”_

_“Why?!” Zevran demanded._

_“A Grey Warden sacrifices themselves to kill the Archdemon. If an Archdemon was killed by anyone else, then its soul would find the nearest Darkspawn and it wouldn’t be killed. Because Grey Wardens have the taint they attract the Archdemon’s soul and both the Archdemon…and the Grey Warden perish.” Alistair explained. “Aedan…Aedan made the choice.”_

_“No!”_

_Zevran didn’t realise the scream had come from him until it was muffled when he buried his face on Aedan’s chest. Just a few hours ago he had been flirting with Aedan, joking about what they would be doing when this Blight was over. And all that time Aedan had known that a sacrifice would have to be made. Anger bubbled up in his stomach, but the sorrow drowned it. He was crying, tears soaking into Aedan’s armour, making the splatters of blood run in rivulets to the floor._

_The sounds of footsteps approached them, causing Alistair to jump back to his feet but Zevran remained still, his head pressed to Aedan’s chest. He could hear something, the slow, sluggish beat of Aedan’s heart. Three times it beat, as if struggling to keep the Grey Warden alive, before it stilled. Voices erupted around him, shouts from those that had survived and cheers for the King but Zevran ignored them all. When Alistair touched his shoulder he jumped._

_“We need to move him.” The King said. His voice was quiet, hoarse, and he was crying. The men around them were all celebrating, unaware of the sacrifice that had been made. Zevran moved back, allowing Alistair to take Aedan into his arms. When he straightened up the men went silent, finally realising what had happened atop the Fortress. “Find Bann Teagan.” Alistair requested, and the men hurried off, whispering between them as they did._

_Alistair followed, gripping Aedan’s limp form tightly. Zevran wasn’t even aware he was walking until the ground slanted beneath them and the large doors to the roof of Fort Drakon swung shut with a groaning sound. The bodies of Darkspawn lay strewn around the Fort, felled by them as they had fought their way through to face the Archdemon. Zevran felt numb. What had it all been for? Freeing the elves and the werewolves from their curse, rescuing the mages from the plight and setting a King on the throne of Orzammar, along with all the other things Aedan had fought for? He had changed Ferelden, touched nearly every race, and died in the space of a year. Zevran’s breath caught as his thoughts ran away. What was he to do now? Aedan had given him the hope of a life outside the Crows and now his life had been taken. What was life in the future without Aedan? The anger bubbled up again but Zevran never got a chance to think on it._

_“Aedan!” A voice yelled. Footsteps were running towards them and Zevran looked up to see a small group of armed men coming their way, led by a tall man with brown hair and a worried expression. “What happened, is he hurt?!” The man demanded._

_“Ah…you must be Fergus Cousland.” Alistair guessed, his voice cracking as he spoke the name. “Aedan’s older brother.”_

_“The same. You are…King Alistair. I heard my brother had gotten you appointed to the throne and scarcely wanted to believe he could be alive. What happened to him?” Fergus confirmed, reaching out to touch Aedan’s face._

_“I’m sorry, Teyrn Cousland.” Alistair said, “But your brother is dead. He sacrificed himself to slay the Archdemon.”_

_All the breath seemed to leave Fergus at once, and he fell to his knees with a cry echoed by the others that had come with him. Another man came forward and supported him, helping him to his feet with a grimace._

_“May I…take my brother’s body?” Fergus requested, taking shaky breaths as his eyes filled with tears. Alistair didn’t seem to want to relinquish him, but he did, allowing Fergus to take his brother and hold him close. “Aedan.” He murmured, “When I heard he had survived I rushed to Denerim. But I was too late to save him. It’s so like him, to sacrifice himself for others.” Fergus’ voice broke and he trailed off, sobbing as he drew Aedan close and held him there._

_“We must leave the Fort,” Alistair murmured, “And see to his body.”_

_Nodding Fergus turned and went back the way he had come, holding Aedan tightly to him. Zevran watched them walk away without moving. There was a feeling in his bones that made it difficult to move. He had no energy. Aedan was dead. Sobs racked his body as it really sank in that he was gone. Alistair noticed Zevran wasn’t with them and went back for him, wrapping an arm around Zevran’s shoulders and gently guiding him through the Fort as Zevran wept._

–

Jolted from the memory by someone knocking at the door Zevran crossed to open it and found Fergus Cousland standing there. Fang bounded off the floor over to him and jumped up, whining. Fergus scratched under his chin with a sad smile before turning his attention back to Zevran.

“King Alistair tells me you’re refusing to come to the funeral.” He said.

Zevran nodded.

“I know you loved him, and I know it’s hard, but it will be one last chance for you to say farewell.” Fergus continued, “You should attend.”

“I don’t want to say farewell!” Zevran snapped, his voice hoarse and slightly weak from the lack of talking and all the crying he had done. “I want answers! He knew! He knew for so long what would have to happen and he didn’t say a word! And then he just goes! Promises the world and then leaves it! I want answers! I want to know why he didn’t say anything. I want…I want to tell him I love him one last time.”

Fergus came into the room, shutting the door to keep Zevran’s outburst private. Fang cowered at the shouting, hiding behind Fergus’ legs.

“Would you have let him go to the final battle had he told you?” The Teyrn asked, “Would you have let him strike the final blow? Aedan was always acutely aware of the selfishness of people, including himself, and yet he was always so selfless. He’d help anyone and everyone without a second thought. And he would have always looked at the bigger picture. Two Grey Wardens, one a boy who lost everything and one a newly appointed King. Ferelden would have been thrown into chaos had Alistair died, or so Aedan believed. Will you hold his choice against him?”

“Yes!” Zevran answered immediately, but after a moment he sighed and sank onto the bed. “No. I know why he didn’t tell me, to spare me the heartache. And I believe he didn’t think it would come to that. He had been told by a senior Grey Warden that the beast would be slain as long as Aedan and Alistair could defend the City, or so Alistair says. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologise.” Fergus said, “You loved him, truly, didn’t you? I asked Alistair about the journey that you embarked on, and he told me about you. My brother loved you too.”

Zevran felt his eyes brimming with tears again, but he hastily wiped them away. “When is the funeral?”

“Tomorrow,” Fergus replied, “They want to transport his body to Weisshaupt to bury it with the other Blight Heroes. King Alistair wanted a ceremony before that happened.”

“I don’t know if I can say goodbye.” Zevran whispered.

Fergus crossed the room and crouched down so they were on eye level. Zevran’s eyes were full of tears again but Fergus’ seemed clear. They were the same sparkling green as Aedan’s, although there was a mischievous mirth hidden in their depth as opposed to the warmth of Aedan’s.

“Everyone has had to say goodbye to someone during this Blight. Today I will bury my little brother. When I return to Highever I will bury my parents, my wife and my son as well.” He began.

“Oh I’m sorry.” Zevran exclaimed, “Aedan did mention about their deaths, I shouldn’t have been so-.”

“Please, I did not bring that up to invalidate your grief.” Fergus interrupted calmly, “It will give me one last chance to say farewell, and to see they get the recognition they deserve after Howe’s betrayal. I’m not ready to say goodbye to my whole family, but I know that if I don’t I will regret it for the rest of my life. And you will most likely feel the same. You’ll always have those precious memories of him, and this.”

Fergus held out his hand and handed Zevran a necklace. Zevran recognised it as Aedan’s, the Warden’s Oath that he had worn since Ostagar, a promise of the Oath he had made when becoming a Grey Warden.

“King Alistair told me the Wardens would want Aedan to be buried with his Oath, but he wanted to give it to me, something to remember him by.” Fergus explained when Zevran looked at him with a confused expression. “But I knew Aedan his entire life. I have all sorts of things to remember him by, especially at home in Highever. He made me a necklace once, and I keep that close to my heart. I think this should go to you.”

“Thank you.” Zevran murmured, “It…means a lot. I will come to the funeral. Aedan would be upset if I didn’t.”

“He’d understand,” Fergus chuckled, although there was barely any mirth in his voice, “That’s just how Aedan was. If you need to talk, or you need some sort of support, come and find me. I’ll be in Highever. I can talk to you about Aedan, if you want.”

“That would be nice, in the future I think.” Zevran agreed. “Oh! I do have something for you. Aedan gave me a letter addressed to you before the final battle. He told me he wanted me to hang onto it, because he was always losing important things. I…didn’t realise what he had meant at the time, but now I do.”

Zevran rummaged in his pack, which lay by the bed and hadn’t been touched since Aedan had died. “Here.”

Fergus took the letter tentatively and nodded. “Thank you. I’ll read this later.”

Zevran nodded as well and stood. Fergus followed and moved towards the door. Fang followed him. “Stay here pup, keep Zevran company.”

Fang whined and padded back over to Zevran, sitting down next to him and panting. Fergus bowed as he left, shutting the door firmly behind him. Zevran looked down at the necklace in his hand. Aedan had barely removed this necklace, and had protected it during fights. It had meant a lot to him. Zevran undid the clasp and fastened it around his neck. He was not a Grey Warden, would never be suited to such a life, but this was an Oath that his love had taken seriously. Closing his hand over the gem on the necklace, Zevran closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

Aedan’s funeral was tomorrow. One last time to say farewell. Aedan had taught him that he did not need the Crows. And he didn’t. Even with Aedan gone he didn’t need the Crows. They would keep coming for him. Opening his eyes again Zevran made a sudden decision as Fang licked his hand, trying to get his attention. He would not wait for the Crows to come to him. He would go to them, and strike at their heart. When his heart had settled and the numb, tired feeling had left his bones, Zevran would chase the Crows instead, and permanently free himself from them.

Collapsing onto the bed Zevran curled up and patted the bed for Fang to jump up with him. The Mabari did so, curling up next to Zevran and resting his head on his paws. Zevran cuddled into him, inhaling his scent and finding himself smiling despite the sorrow in his heart. Aedan had always spoken about how much he loved the smell of Mabari, especially Fang, because it reminded him of home. It was a scent Zevran believed he would always now associate with Aedan.

He fell asleep curled around Fang, clutching the Oath around his neck. As he was drifting off Zevran thought he saw a figure in the room, but it was a familiar, soothing presence similar to how Aedan’s presence had been. Calmed for the first time since Aedan’s death, Zevran slept peacefully, a dreamless sleep that had him waking feeling refreshed. Fang yawned and nudged Zevran’s hand as the elf got dressed in some finery Alistair had gotten hold of for him in preparation for the funeral.

“Let’s go, Fang.” Zevran declared, “It’s time to say farewell.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my warden makes the ultimate sacrifice bc there are too many risks involved with the dark ritual in his opinion, and alistair has to be King.  
> angst filled and the longest one /o/


End file.
